I mean, seriously. When you realize you have several weeks worth of free time, the first thought you get is usually along the lines of shitfuckdamnitsaboutmormontimeyeehawozah!!1!
A few days later you find out that you don't have anything to do. You've emptied out your fathers liquor cabinet, done the laundry, aired out your stuffy room, dusted off the bookshelves and even taken your dear old bitter and hateful grandma out shopping for new curtains and now there's nothing left to occupy your time! So you're stuck at home because the one thing you hate more than a serious lack in the insane-stunts-and-stupid-ideas department is social interaction, which is clearly a redundant and unnecessary part of modern life - can't we all just live through the internet? - and thus your vacation time is being used for completely useless and inane things like peeling rotten apples and working on your blog. Your stupid, rambling, who-reads-this-shitlicker blog.
And yeah, whining about the fact that I'm safe and sound in my own home with no pressing matters to tend to seems a bit silly when you think about all the political unrest and starving children in third world countries!! etc. but frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn. (I did not just use that line. There is no way I just used that line. You must be mistaken, ugly sir. I would never use that line. I don't know nuthin' about no line, so leave me be and go fish in someone else's waters with those hideous duck traps of yours! Okay, that one I did use and I am, for perhaps the second or third time in my entire life, truly and deeply sorry.)
That is why you, my imaginary reader, are now subjected to a full page of my quite humorous but often times pointless ponderings and observations. Okay, maybe not a full page. More like half a page. But it's the better half of the page. Kinda like if you took a full page of text and then just... glared at it until it rearranged itself into a more compact and to-the-pointish form. Except that since my entries are usually heavy in the "no context" and light and airy in the "has a point" compartments, it's just a long summary of boredcrazyhypedoncaffeineandbiscuits. Incidentally, I love using the cursive to make certain statements or words stand out so that you can all realize how important they are.
Oh, now I must go. I have to wake up early tomorrow 'cause I'm going to the "Mouth of the River" for some aimless wandering. So much for the whole "woe is me for I have nothing to do" thing. All this cityhopping is wreaking havoc on my poor don't-leave-your-room instincts. Oh well... But before I leave, one last piece of wisdom. Remember kiddies: always take the short route, unless you're using up someone else's time or gas in which case, feel free to dawdle to your heartz desire.
Ostrich racing
Ostriches are large enough for a small person to ride them, typically while holding on to the wings for grip, and in some areas of northern Africa and the Arabian Peninsula ostriches are trained as racing mounts. There is little possibility of the practice becoming more widespread, due to the irascible temperament and the difficulties encountered in saddling the birds. Ostrich races in the United States have been criticized by animal rights organizations.
Comrades, appreciate your fellow flight-challenged brethren. Be reborn!
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